Adventures of Darth Daddy

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Letter from me

Sorry fo rmy absense. I've written several posts trying to explain what was goign on - and never posted any of them. I had hoped that there was still a way of working things out. 3 weeks from the initiating event, I trust that the reason I'm getting no reply is because the worst has happened, and they hope I go queetly away. Such is not my way.

For almost a year, I've had problems with someone at my Norfolk Aikido dojo. He's a real asshole. I was friends with him when he first arrived - I found out what an asshole he was, and didn't talk to him much more. He orchestrated a bunch of problems for me at the dojo, causing a bunch of people to not talk to me, or refuse to work with me. Nothing was spoken - it was like I was being shunned.
No one would talk about it . There seemed no way to "fix" the problem. Being quiet and humble wasn't working. I wrote a post on my martial arts blog in the hopes of stirring up whoever read it (enough to get them talking to me), but instead I got an email from the instructor asking me not to come back. I was deemed a legal risk to the dojo, and asked not to return until they could talk to a lawyer.

Since then, I have sent not only a letter of explaination, but 2 follow up letters, and have recieved no response. I originally posted my Freedom Of Speech post to show that I was not a legal liability, and hoped the dojo would encounter no action because of what I posted.

The farther we get from OCt 20th, and the lack of response from the instructor lead me to believe that I have been 100% officially kicked out of Aikido of Norfolk. The 'hands off approach', and 'letting us work it out' appearently only applied while I was being shit on. While I sat there with no partner - while people talked behind my back, while people organiazed partnering so that I'd have to sit there with no one to wirk with, - - - I was on my own. As soon as I try to do something to provolk change, I get booted.

I will miss the instruction. I'll miss Steve, Sean, Mark and Wendy. I'll miss the new guys who made comments like "I really enjoy working with you", and "Man, I wish I had partnered with you earlier - you really took the time to show me this technique. You'd make a good teacher."

I'd still like to hear from you , Jim. If there's a way of working things out constructively, I wouldn't mind persuing it.

I figured I'd write this post because it's bound to get back to the dojo. I'm not sure whether my emails are not being received or being ignored. I'm willing to sit down and talk about this - I'm willing to make compromises for the sake of maintaining the class atmosphere - but I'm not willing to be hushed when I have the right to speak out. And I should have the right to be informed if I'm being officially kicked out. Going to the dojo was my release of stress from home - it shouldn't have been allowed to become a source of stress.


  • At 10:05 AM, Blogger Margaret said…

    This must be very frustrating for you. I would be led to think also, that no response means no good reason for the action.

    No response = the response of a coward. Which you would be better off not associating with in the long run. Others will eventually come to this conclusion also.

    Hang in there, you will find a better release and focus. I'm certain of it.

  • At 11:19 PM, Blogger Kurt Schroeder said…

    My thoughts exactly. People who don't respond to honest and open lines of communication are cowards or know they are wrong. Otherwise, they ave no reason not to repond appropriately.

    By the way, I mentioned you in our Christmas Letter. This year's prize is homemade ornaments.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Site Meter